Wednesday, October 19, 2005

How Can We Build Ourselves

One of the most important forms of communication is interpersonal communication. The more time and energy we spend in this area, the more likely that we will be able to reach the goals we set for ourselves. This is the area of abilities which makes it possible for us to live with the person of our choice and work at the job or our choice. Those are two of the most important considerations for anyone.

First, we must look at ourselves. Who are we and who do they think we are? Look at these areas carefully. Most of us have some idea of who we are. But, we make a simple mistake by assuming that what we think is what others think as well. Other people decide about you and me based on what we say and do. Clearly the most important of those two is what we do. We can clarify what we are doing by providing those around us with explanations of what we are doing and why. What we believe to be perfectly clear can be made much clearer by what we say. Those two must go together.

Second, we must look at others. Who are they and who do they think they are? We look at them and what they do and decide for ourselves how they mean. We often don't ask because there's no real need to have explanations for what we already "know to be true." Often we are wrong, at least in part. We must set aside the time and energy to do what is necessary for us to reach our goals.

Clearly, this is going to involve doing what we do, and then finding a way to talk to those around us so we can adjust their perceptions of what they think we're doing. For a start, this will give us a plan to begin building a future for ourselves that we can be happy about.